"Life isn't about surviving the storm...it is about learning to dance in the rain." Anonymous

Wednesday, February 19, 2014

What is love?

I read such a great article today.  It was an article that was about love and Valentine's Day.  The Huffington Post had asked for people to send in pictures that depicted true love.  Someone had sent in a picture of herself and her partner in the hospital on the day that her daughter was born still.  The picture is not a picture of what most would consider lovely.  It is certainly not a happy picture.  It is a picture of two parents grieving together.  Loving their daughter together.  Being together.


When I saw the picture and read the article, there were several things that came into my mind.  One was an image of my husband.  My quiet, wonderful, six foot three inch tall, past-football playing husband silently binding my breasts after our Elizabeth was born still.  That remains, in my mind, one of the most powerful experiences of my life.  I remember that he cried as he wrapped the tight bandage around my breasts and helped me put the cabbage leaves in.  I had so much milk coming in.  I remember him saying how wrong it was that she would not be able to drink it.  It was my birthday.  And when he was finished, he said, "I am sorry your birthday can not be happy."  It was the most masculine thing he has ever done.  It was also the most loving.


The other thing that came to mind when I read that article and saw that picture was the amount of love I felt for my daughter every day that I carried her, especially on the day she was born.  I was so many things that day....scared, devastated, heartbroken....but most of all, I was in love.  Completely, utterly, crazy in love.  I still am.  I love that little girl so much that I cry as I type this.  I loved her.  I love her.  I will love her every single day of my life. 


There are many people who never have the opportunity to appreciate true love.  I have.  I know what it means to love someone so much that I would have truly sacrificed everything in order for her to live. 


I realized tonight that I hold something amazing....I hold her story.  And it is a powerful one.  Each of us has a story to tell.  I think the ones of us who live the shortest times have the biggest stories of all.  They touch so many people.  My Elizabeth touched me like no one has ever or will ever again.  She brought out the most tender part of her daddy's heart and she opened my eyes and my heart and makes me appreciate the love around me. 


That is love.